Its true that I am not able to bring happiness to everyone but please do not deprive me from trying to make you HAPPY...............................................

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Heart tired.. Heart coward..

Hi blog.. i think i really very useless.. dont know why.. people depending on me.. yet i myself trying to stuff all the burdens without cared about whether i can take it anot.. now at home.. yet very tired.. thats also for yesterday.. so didnt blogged....

Yesterday.. was at school doing project instead of studying.. yet after i organised it.. i didnt lead it to a right path.. they doing other things.. which i should have prevented that.. but i didnt instead i go help them... so project meeting failed.. more worse.. i make someone cried.. cause i accidentally played a prank on her.. which actually not.. its just so accidentally.. of course i apologised.. yet this is the first time i cause someone cried.. especially female.. i really very sad that day.. guilty.. i think the only true me will be free of all this kind of troubles.. but i just cant turn back anymore... i wanna apologise sincerely again.. yet the coward heart i have.. cant speak out.. now i understand why its easy to say "thank you" but not for "sorry" although she forgave me... yet she not as close as before le.. well.. i mean i just destroyed all the effort i built up for a relationship to a better friendship.. i just felt that....

Today.. wanna say sorry again in the first lesson.. as usual met siangyee and reach school early.. then was very tired.. been having 3 sleepless days until yesterday.. dozed off.. and sleep straight 8 hours.. which i greatly regretted.. so many things never do.. now gonna rush it.. with a tired body... back to the subject.. wanna say sorry.. yet as i predicted.. she normally will say something.. this time dont have.. and i suddenly.. "swallowed" the words i want to said.. haiz.. lesson started.. i sleep.. all the way..

went to free access lab during break.. and met dennis.. he need help in comprog.. and just nice the lab i in is later the class he going to attend.. so i have a nice chat with him again.. but well.. as usual we need to separate again.. wanted to skip eaud tutorial.. but decided not to.. since qiaofeng still waiting for me....

Promised to go basketball.. at 7.30pm.. but late cause i meet up with siangyee and reeve and have alot of walking.. in causeway point and we had dinner at a small eatery house outside.. quite remote.. and crammed.. but the food nice.. so hack care.. then took bus to the basketball court... Hoped to met her in bus.. but as i expected.. do i really fall in love with her.. or just a temporary feeling..i not sure.. since fate didnt even let me have the chance when after i got the feeling.. and i got no courage.. this will sooner or later be a gone case.... haiz.. hack care now.. study important.. blog hopping time.... Fan Signing off.....

Ended the storytelling at -->12:11 AM
I am just a Fool who want to make who I cared to be happy.
=========================

*_-_MY TRUSTED ONES_-_*

* _ - _ E V G _ - _ *
[==_ Joseph _==]
[==_ IYeu _==]
[==_ Siangyee _==]
[==_ KianWee _==]
[==_ HiuFeng _==]

* _ - _ C o l l e a g u e s _ - _ *
[==_ SiNi _==]
[==_ Justin _==]
[==_ Chariot _==]
[==_ Alan _==]
[==_ Alan2 _==]
[==_ Jack _==]
[==_ Janine _==]
[==_ Umairah _==]

* _ - _ Q i h u a _ - _ *
[==_ LiHui _==]
[==_ Aeris _==]
[==_ Tracy _==]
[==_ Genevieve _==]

* _ - _ T e m a s e k P o l y t e c h n i c _ - _*
[==_ Haikal _==]
[==_ Adriel _==]
[==_ Siti _==]

* _ - _ F a m i l i e s _ - _ *
[==_ MingYi (small bro) _==]
[==_ HweePing (Cousin) _==]
[==_ ShuLing (Cousin) _==]
[==_ Photo Blog _==]

*_-_My Own Creation Of Blog Skins_-_*

[.:: 1st skin ::.]
[.:: 2nd skin ::.]
[.:: 3rd skin ::.]
[.:: 4th skin ::.]
[.:: 5th skin ::.]
[.:: 6th skin ::.]
[.:: 7th skin ::.]
[.:: 8th skin ::.]

Name -> Hu MingFan
Age -> Going 20 this year
Occupation -> Temasek Polytechnic Student
Birth date -> 19 OCT 1988
E-mail -> humingfan@hotmail.com

Never do that on me!!!
*Being looked down
*Being judged just by few stuffs
*Being criticised by friends
*Friends that never know my existence
*Cant do what i want
*Being forced to do what i dont like
*Friends that only care about themselves
*Friends that abandon me

What i love???
*Being praised on my performance
*Be with my friends
*Play with my friends
*Sports & Games
*Idling away
*Chatting
*Having a smooth day
*Laugh with my friends
*Blog Hopping =D

What am i truely???
Okay above listed were just my basic characteristic trait. But i dont think you could know me well from there.
Well, what i typed out now, is surely opposite of what you all think of me.

I am a quiet boy, true enough. But to avoid for friends to feel bored and embarrassed, i start conversation but the likelyhood is low. Force me chat with a topic. I will never say no to a chat.
Too helpful, considered a weakness to me but not to you all, right? Mostly what you all asked i will do it, as long i can. Of course i stil got some unwillingness sometimes.
Still a thrill seeker, you can make that out, and you will see my hyperactive side.
My talkative side? I am a cyber chatterbox.
A very negative boy and no compeition mindset. Motivate me, if not, you can win me as easy as 1.2.3. % being motivated is 20% unless u make me unhappy with u.
Look like blur boy, but can actually know how you feel, sensitive to emotions. Anything stirred, i can feel it.
A very secretive boy, say anything to me i will just keep it. Even my stuffs. I will never say out, dont try to make me say out, cause probably will hurt me afterward or you.
Too easy to satisfied, due to my lives, everythings hard to come by, so i will treasured every little things u gave me. Thanks.
Am i stupid? Thats up to you, but to be frank. I always a lazy person to start off, so no efforts and so, no result. Unless needed if not i wont show out what i know. The most wrong things to do is.. look down on me.
To be honest, i quite an good actor, cause you never know the true side of me, so just know it and deal with me. Thats a friend i really want...

What i want...
*~~Be happy forever~~
*~~Have the N91 phone~~
*Grow taller
*Slim down
*~~A laptop~~
*A own room
*s+uDy r00m
*~~Friends that really care~~
*Family that understand me
*Having a healthy lifestyle
*Get serious on my studies
*Study really hard for my exam